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When Will We Be Ready To Be Loved?
By Chelsea Fagan
I think I am able to recognize my better qualities. If someone were to ask, I think I could make a small checklist of the things I do well, perhaps even better than the majority of people around me. I don’t think that I am a worthless person, or a bad person, and I can step back from myself enough to say that there are good qualities there.
I think I’m pretty aware of my looks, of where I would fall on that infamous 10-point scale. I am certainly more palatable when dolled up and under flattering lighting, but I don’t think I’m a bridge troll first thing in the morning. Like most people, I would say I fall somewhere on the “average” side of things, and that suits me just fine.
I believe in my capacity to love and care for others; I know that I have friends and family and even lovers whom I treat well and show affection for. I think that, in my presence, they know that someone is there for them and wants to hear what they have to say. When I listen, I try to really understand and take everything in — I know how much a good listener can make someone feel immediately better.
And yet, in spite of all of these things (things which appeal to the more rational side of my brain, as they can often be, in some ways, objectively quantified and reinforced by others), I sometimes wonder deeply how anyone…
