Don’t Act Like You Walked Away Because ‘I Deserved Better’

Ирина Чернышова

By Holly Riordan

Don’t act like you are doing me a favor by leaving. Don’t talk about how you are unable to give me what I need and how you love me enough to leave so I can find someone who fits me better. That is bullshit.

You are perfectly capable of giving me those things, but you are choosing not to. You are choosing to break my heart instead. You are choosing to pick the laziest option possible.

You might think you are doing the right thing, but you are really doing the easy thing. It’s easier to walk away from me than to change your behavior. It’s easier to give up on us than to fight for us. You are taking the easy way out and trying to sound heroic.

I am not going to thank you for leaving me. I am not going to be okay with you walking away just because you have some BS excuse about how my happiness is the most important thing to you. If that were the truth, then you would be working harder to bring me happiness. You wouldn’t be doing this to me. You wouldn’t be putting me through this pain.

Don’t act like you care about me when your actions say the opposite. Don’t try to blame this breakup on me. Don’t make yourself feel better by pretending I am going to be so much happier once you are gone.

I am sick of your self-destructive habits. I am tired of listening to you talk about how much better I deserve. I hate when you pity yourself.

Everything between us would get better if you would stop feeling sorry for yourself. Stop acting like you are incapable of change. You could be a good boyfriend if you put in the effort, but you insist on acting lazy. You keep repeating the same mistakes instead of finding the strength to take another path.

If you really wanted our relationship to last, if you wanted to stay with me, if you wanted to give me what I deserved, then you would raise your expectations for yourself. You would become a better person. You would delete your dating apps. You would come home on time. You would stop with the lies and the manipulations. You would be real with me.

But you don’t even want to try to change. You don’t want to give us a fighting chance. You would rather continue to act the same way you have always acted. You would rather stay exactly the same, even if it means losing me.

If you want to end our relationship, that is fine. I am not going to argue. I am not going to convince you to stay. But don’t you dare act like the reason you are leaving is because I deserve better.

Own up to your shit. Admit that you are leaving because you are not willing to try. Because I do not mean enough for you to change.

Holly Riordan is a writer and author from Long Island, New York.