By Chrissy Stockton
1. When you need someone to open up about something, have them drive you somewhere.
People are at ease behind the wheel because they are in charge of their surroundings. Their attention is also primarily on the road and secondarily on the conversation you’re having, so if you catch them off guard they’ll feel both comfortable and surprised enough to give you an honest answer. Also, sitting side by side with someone during a difficult conversation is less intimidating than staring each other in the eyes.
2. When you want to establish a connection with someone, ask them about their family.
Inevitably they will say something sad at which point you can rub their arm and say “that must be hard for you.” Okay, I stole this trick from Friends, but it totally works. Well, one time the guy started crying, but all the other times it has led to great conversations.
3. If they have not responded to your last two texts, there is no circumstance in which you need to text them again.
Whatever you’re thinking of right now is not an exception. Put down your phone.
4. Compliment people as often as possible.
It’s especially important to tell the person you are dating why you like them–as opposed to needing/liking any man/woman as long as you are in a relationship. Too many people are desperate to “settle down” and they lose track of finding the right person, when your values should be the other way around. No one will be excited to be in a relationship because they are a warm body with the right kind of genitals that happened to be around. Feeling good about yourself helps bring excitement into the relationship.
5. Likewise, compliment yourself.
You don’t need to do this out loud, just know why you are someone that people want to date. When you view yourself as a valuable commodity, other people will adopt this view as well.