10 Reasons Your Last Failed Relationship Isn’t A Failure, It’s A Lesson

Thought Catalog
4 min readNov 27, 2022

By Nicole Tarkoff

1. It makes you realize the love that you deserve (and who deserves your love in return).

Sometimes it’s difficult to accept love, and sometimes it’s even more difficult to realize that you deserve it. A failed relationship is an opportunity for you to recognize all the things your partner failed to give you, and all the things you gave them that they failed to appreciate. You deserve someone who doesn’t take those things for granted, someone who appreciates the little things you do for them, and who does little things for you in return.

2. You learn what you do and do not want.

When you and your partner fail to make each other happy, you realize what it is you want that they never gave you. It made you angry when he never thanked you, and now you realize all you want is a decent dose of gratitude. It made you sad when she broke the promises she made, and now you realize all you want is loyalty. The disappointments you endured allow you to figure out what it is you truly want so that you’ll never have to endure the same disappointments again.

3. You learn what you need from someone else.

Being in a relationship teaches you how to balance dependability. You find the line between depending on your partner, and allowing them to depend on you, and you attempt to manage both. And when either one of you fails to be dependable you realize exactly what you need from someone else that they just couldn’t give to you.

4. You learn what you don’t need from someone else.

When the relationship ends you quickly begin to realize everything you’re capable of completely on your own. Solitude becomes something you appreciate rather than fear, and independence feels less like loneliness and more like an accomplishment.

5. You learn what you’re not willing to give.

Flexibility is key, but for the sake of a relationship, there are some things not worth compromising. You shouldn’t have to give up a part…



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